Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise.

— Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

I know that most men—not only those considered clever, but even those who are very clever and capable of understanding most difficult scientific, mathematical, or philosophic problems—can very seldom discern even the simplest and most obvious truth if it be such as to oblige them to admit the falsity of conclusions they have formed, perhaps with much difficulty—conclusions of which they are proud, which they have taught to others, and on which they have built their lives.

— LEO TOLSTOY, WHAT IS ART? (1897)

All my friends are finding new beliefs. This one converts to Catholicism and this one to trees. In a highly literary and hitherto religiously-indifferent Jew God whomps on like a genetic generator. Paleo, Keto, Zone, South Beach, Bourbon. Exercise regimens so extreme she merges with machine. One man marries a woman twenty years younger and twice in one brunch uses the word verdant; another’s brick-fisted belligerence gentles into dementia, and one, after a decade of finical feints and teases like a sandpiper at the edge of the sea, decides to die. Priesthoods and beasthoods, sombers and glees, high-styled renunciations and avocations of dirt, sobrieties, satieties, pilgrimages to the very bowels of being . . . All my friends are finding new beliefs and I am finding it harder and harder to keep track of the new gods and the new loves, and the old gods and the old loves, and the days have daggers, and the mirrors motives, and the planet’s turning faster and faster in the blackness, and my nights, and my doubts, and my friends, my beautiful, credible friends.

— CHRISTIAN WIMAN, “ALL MY FRIENDS ARE FINDING NEW BELIEFS”

The main thing that I learned about conspiracy theory is that conspiracy theorists actually believe in a conspiracy because that is more comforting. The truth of the world is that it is chaotic. The truth is that it is not the Jewish Banking Conspiracy or the Gray Aliens or the twelve-foot reptiloids from another dimension that are in control. The truth is far more frightening: Nobody is in control. The world is rudderless.

— ALAN MOORE, THE MINDSCAPE OF ALAN MOORE (2003)

Hatred has its pleasures. It is therefore often the compensation by which a frightened man reimburses himself for the miseries of Fear. The more he fears, the more he will hate.

— C. S. LEWIS, THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS

It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.

— MARK TWAIN*... * Or perhaps not. You can’t trust everything you find on the internet. This quote, though widely attributed to Twain, can’t be confirmed to be his. The interesting question is whether, a month from now, you will remember this quote as if it were Twain’s.

In the long run my observations have convinced me that some men, reasoning preposterously, first establish some conclusion in their minds which, either because of its being their own or because of their having received it from some person who has their entire confidence, impresses them so deeply that one finds it impossible ever to get it out of their heads. Such arguments in support of their fixed idea as they hit upon themselves or hear set forth by others, no matter how simple and stupid these may be, gain their instant acceptance and applause. On the other hand whatever is brought forward against it, however ingenious and conclusive, they receive with disdain or with hot rage—if indeed it does not make them ill. Beside themselves with passion, some of them would not be backward even about scheming to suppress and silence their adversaries.

— GALILEO GALILEI, DIALOGUE CONCERNING THE TWO CHIEF WORLD SYSTEMS (1632)

We meet aliens every day who have something to give us. They come in the form of people with different opinions.

— WILLIAM SHATNER

Human beings are pattern-seeking animals who will prefer even a bad theory or a conspiracy theory to no theory at all.

— CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS

For there are two possible reactions to social ostracism—either a man emerges determined to be better, purer, and kindlier or he goes bad, challenges the world and does even worse things. This last is by far the commonest reaction to stigma.

— JOHN STEINBECK, CANNERY ROW (1945)

Brian: Look, you’ve got it all wrong! You don’t need to follow me, you don’t need to follow anybody! You’ve got to think for yourselves! You’re all individuals! The Crowd (in unison): Yes! We’re all individuals! Brian: You’re all different! The Crowd (in unison): Yes, we are all different! Man in Crowd: I’m not.

— MONTY PYTHON’S LIFE OF BRIAN (1979)

When we discover that someone we trusted can be trusted no longer, it forces us to reexamine the universe, to question the whole instinct and concept of trust.

— ADRIENNE RICH

Solutions nearly always come from the direction you least expect, which means there’s no point trying to look in that direction because it won’t be coming from there.

— DOUGLAS ADAMS, THE SALMON OF DOUBT